I’ve tried to deliver the message over and over in this blog, but I’ve never said it better, and it can’t be said too many times: “Caregivers need to ditch the Superman cape!“
Trying to be superhuman is the most common caregiver mistake. It’s also the mistake with the most serious potential consequences for the care recipient. After all, what happens to that care recipient if the caregiver burns out?
Every time you travel by air, the emergency oxygen briefing gives you a mini-lesson in what you need to do as a caregiver. Put on your own oxygen mask before attempting to help others. The underlying rule is the same for caregivers as it is for air travelers. Take care of yourself first.
It’s surprising how counter-intuitive this can be in the context of caregiving. When you decide to become a home caregiver, it’s because someone you love needs the help you can provide. Health, strength, competence, love and devotion are all on your side. Neediness is on your care recipient’s side. So how can it be true that you have to take care of yourself first?
Most caregivers learn the answer to that question in short order. Caregiving presents round-the-clock demands. The work is isolating and exhausting. At some point, you will certainly feel overwhelmed and alone. So, as caregiver, you have to take care of yourself because there is no one else to do it. You have to take care of yourself first in order to stay ahead of the pressures and demands that will wear you down. The long and short of it is that to be a successful caregiver you must become as great an advocate for yourself as you are for your care recipient.
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There are 2 Responses to “Common Sense for Caregivers”
#2 Joshua - 03 July, 7:21 PM
It is amazing to see so many caregivers get burnt out. There’s so many things that you need to concentrate on, dot your i’s and cross your t’s.
Basically those who help themselves can help others.
Thanks for the reminder!
#1 Carol D. O'Dell - 03 July, 9:32 AM
I couldn’t agree more. I took off my superman cape and wrote the truth about my caregiving experience–my frustrations, resentments, fears–and even fantasies of life without caregiving.
It became a book, MOTHERING MOTHER: A Daughter’s Humorous and Heartbreaking Memoir, available on Amazon and in most bookstores.
I hope it might help others feel they’re not alone.